Alryte man..its time to rant on and on over here. Man, i feel like popping some sleeping pills into my mouth and fall into a good deep sleep. I slept at 11pm just now cos there was simply nothing productive for me to do and guess what? I woke up at 12.30pm feeling all so awake and fresh. And now i cant get back to sleep any further, how am i gonna wake up early tomorrow morning to go to church? :shrugs:
This whole week seemed to pass by very slowly. Ive no idea why, maybe its because i havent been stepping out of the house much. I din go for any exercise this week nor any tanning session with my mates. So much of a slacker heh?
Next week is gonna be my last free week to do anything im fond of before i officially start my training session at Citibank and get down to real working and experience gaining. Honestly speaking, its a little uneasy having the thought of working in Citibank. It just gives me the creeps. I rather not get the job, really.
So i'll prolly make use of my time next week to do something more productive. Tanning, working out and yes to clubbing. Its been a long long time..Oh yes, im gonna clear my drawers and get rid of those notes in semester one. Out out OUT of my life u useless pieces of paper!
Should i make do with my N6610 and buy a digicam? Or buy a new camera phone prolly Samsung E600C cos im so broke right now?
Ive been thinking much about my romance today. The idea of letting go, giving up and stop being a bitch actually strucked me. Is that the only ethical way? So now, is it wrong to fall in love? Or is it wrong to hold on to a love? Why do i always have to give up on my love? Why is it always me getting the hurts and pains? Im always the one giving away the best wishes to my love and his girl. Why is it still me this time? Isnt it time to be someone else?
You asked me if i really love you that much. I couldnt answer but made a joke out of it by saying "lend me a weighing machine, wait till i weigh it before telling you the answer". Im actually trying to escape from answering your question. Because deep down, ive no idea if i really fell for you. Ive no idea how much i love you. I only know, you're the only guy in my heart right now.
Edmund is outta my life. And i know it, cos i wasnt bothered about his birthday today. Not at all. I didnt bother making sure, i didnt bother messaging him, i didnt bother about his existence no more. Time heals all pains. But yet, unhappy experiences flashed through my mind here and there, i guess its something i can never forget. u bastard, caused my life to be in such a mess. If it wasnt for you, me and him would have been together before his girlfriend came along to join in. All thanks to you. I HATE YOU.
Oh yay, its 3.05am already. Hopefully i can get some sleep now.
* yours truly.
amber.ruoxuan\\twenty\
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20051987\\single\\operations analyst @ credit suisse\\friendster*
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